Here is part two of our answers to frequently asked questions.
How do you feel about being a trans-racial family? We feel both excited and nervous. It has been amazing the past few months because our church has really begun to become a multi-racial church with people of all cultures and background. We love it, and it is truly a picture of what heaven will be like with “…every nation, tribe, people and language, standing before the throne and in front of the Lamb.” (Revelations 20:6).
We are also nervous for the unknown, as I’m sure every first time parent is. We know we will have unique challenges being a trans-racial family (I have no idea how to style African hair J) but we also know we don’t have to do any of this alone and our surrounded by an amazing community of friends and family that will love and support us along the way.
Do you pick your Child? Some people ask if we will get something like a catalog of children and “pick” which one we want. The way it works with our agency is that once we get to the top of the waiting list we will get a “referral”. A referral provides a picture and whatever background information is available about the child. You have the option to accept or deny that referral, and the child will move to the next in line.
Will you travel to get the child? This question is either phrased as “do you have to travel” or “do you get to travel” to pick up your child. The answer is yes to both. The Congo government requires one parent to travel to the country to finalize the adoption. However, as we see it as an amazing opportunity to experience the culture, sights, and sounds of the country our child was born, we will both be traveling to the country. We also both love to travel and experience the way others live.
Will you get to name your child or will you keep their African name? We have a list of favorite names and I think we have settled on our girl and boy name. You can ask us if you are dying to know, but won’t post it here until it is official. We have considered keeping the child’s African name as a middle name.
How much does it cost? Children are never bought, but the adoption process does have costs due to the legal paperwork involved. Initially, the cost was one of the biggest factors that deterred us from considering adoption at this point in our life. However, once we began to research the process we found out about tax credits and grants available to help. My encouragement if you have considered adoption but the cost was the main factor in delaying or dismissing adoption, don’t. Talk to me and I’d be happy to discuss more details.
How many children do you want? Right now we say 3 – 4 because we love the idea of a bigger family. Life doesn’t usually work out the way you plan. If you had asked me a year ago where I’d be today, it would look radically different, but we wouldn’t have it any other way. We’ll see where God leads our family, and we are excited for the journey.
