Numero Seis

Sorry we haven’t posted in a while, it’s partially due to the fact I just wasn’t sure what to write. I’ve limited myself to asking for new waitlist numbers to once a month for the sanity of both me and our agency, as I would probably be tempted to ask for numbers daily. About a week ago we hit the one month mark, asked for new numbers, and found out we didn’t move at all. I was deflated. We had moved 7 spots in 2 months, and then none the 3rdmonth. I know the numbers don’t really mean anything – you can’t correlate them to something like weeks or months, it’s just a number. But somehow that number gives me the perception that something is happening, that we are getting closer, that this adoption will actually happen.

Thursday was the 6 month mark since we applied, and looking back the 6 months have gone by quickly. However, we have reached a point where it doesn’t quite feel real. The initial excitement of telling everyone has worn off, people ask how the process is going and we have no news, there is no more paperwork or anything for us to physically be doing, we are just waiting. Part of me wants to guard my heart, not get too excited in case something happens, but then I realize I’m missing out on so much joy. So once I again I let myself get excited; to look at cribs and strollers, to dream about rocking my baby to sleep and to plan for the future as a family of 3. I know my feelings and emotions are not unique, and when I read other adoption blogs I find that are actually quite common. One of the blogs posted this verse, which is my new theme for this journey: Romans 12:12 “Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.”

Yesterday we e-mailed our agency with a different question, and of course snuck in the “where are we on the list?” The good news – we moved and are now number 6! So we continue to choose to be joyful in hope while we patiently wait and pray. Thank you for your continued prayer and support!